Karen Friedman

Do not betray your values to indulge self-absorbed clients.

I was waiting for a train when I ran into a big celebrity. We’ve known each other for years. When I was a reporter who covered his comings and goings, he gushed at my presence. When I ran for political office he contributed to my campaign and even called on occasion. When I wrote a book, he was happy to be quoted and see his name in print. Yet recently when I walked up to him with a big hello and outstretched hand, he barely acknowledged me saying “oh hi, nice to see you” and then quickly walked away.

At first I was surprised. Surprise turned to annoyed. Annoyed turned to insulted. Then I realized caring at all was a waste of energy. Most of us have come across people like this. They welcome you with open arms when they think you are in a position to help or possibly hurt them. When you no longer hold those cards, they discard you like a used tissue. Their former smiles, grandiose gestures and attentiveness were never sincere to begin with. [Read more…] about Don’t betray your values to indulge self-absorbed clients

I had a new business appointment with a former client I hadn’t seen in more than 10 years. He said to take the elevator to his floor and call him when I got there. So I did, only he didn’t answer. I tried to follow the instructions at the lobby desk prompting me to dial different numbers for help getting in, but the system was down. Hmm. I had arrived early but was now concerned about running late When I peered through the door and saw my client walking down the hall. So I waved. He waved back and rushed my way to open the door.

“Hi, he said. It’s nice to see you”. “Same to you” I answered back. Then I gave him a hug and he hugged me back. Following him through the door and down the long hallway, we chatted a bit on the way to his office. Then we stopped. He looked at me. I took a closer look at him. Suddenly he said “how do I know you?” That was when I realized I didn’t know him at all. I had just hugged a total stranger who I thought I knew because he looked like a guy with hair I remembered from 10 years ago. [Read more…] about Making small talk reap big benefits

A client of ours has started a new initiative but is struggling to get anyone to sign up. I asked what the initiative is about and was told it’s a savings model that benefits members if they meet certain quality and cost metrics. What do they save, I inquired. Well, they don’t really save anything I was told but they can reduce costs for their customers.

That sounds good I offered, but how does it work? Well, they explained, they go to a website, sign up and receive a free membership. What does the membership get them I asked to which the reply was “what do you mean?” [Read more…] about ‘Dumb’ is not a nice word